What's love got to do with it?

There are so many ideas about love, but what is love and what does it have to do with a relationship?

Love is a lot of things. In Greek, there are multiple words for love that help differentiate what someone means. When you tell someone you love them, the question is how, as a friend, family, or romantically. For the sake of time, let's just talk about romantic love. 

Romantic love is the acknowledgment of a heart condition where your needs are second to another. A deeper connection built upon a foundation of friendship. Our brains builds pathways of familiarity with friends, and over time, these pathways become more ingrained within us. One way to think of this is digging a hole, the longer you're digging the deeper it gets and soon you're in it so deep you're completely in this hole you've dug. Love is patient. It love develops over time, where every stroke of the shovel brings you closer to a bigger hole. 

Romantic love must be united. As the hole gets bigger there are a few options: stick with this hole even if the dirt is firm and rocky or move onto fertile ground. This decision is harder than you think and comes from a few factors: commitment level, time frame, values and heart. If you and your s/o are not on the same page then what is dating for? Know what you want out of a relationship.

**Values should come before heart in a relationship. Especially religious values. If you and your s/o do not believe the same religious things this will stand in the way as long as one or both of you have these differing values and the relationship will not stand. Values need to come before feelings.

Matthew Murdock and Karen Page: The Daredevil Within

**Spoilers**

Matthew Murdock and Karen Page start dating in Daredevil Season 2. I was SO excited. The idea that the risk to Matthew was worth it to be with Karen was thrilling.

Whenever someone starts dating it means they've answered a serious question:

Is loving worth the risk?

The more we love the more risk we take. At the end of season 2, Matthew Murdock takes the largest risk a superhero can, revealing his identity. Love requires risk and openness. Being open is hard and there are a lot of ways that being open is scary. All of the secrets you thought you could hide forever either comes out or come between you two. Walls keep us safe, but they also keep us alone. Similarly to national safety, our love lives have to balance between being safe and having others involved. If we love each other their walls compliment our walls, in the good ways and bad. People who are closer to you MUST have less walls between the two of you. Some people are more defensive than others and have more walls, which is okay, but the walls between you and your s/o need to be less than between you and the rest of the world, especially if marriage is on the table.


So is it worth it? Well, Matthew Murdock decided it was when he revealed his identity.

Love gives us access to more than we have before. No pain, no gain, right? By allowing us to feel deeply we allow someone to hurt us in new and deeper ways than we have been hurt before. This pain CAN be great, but love WILL be great.

So will Matthew Murdock and Karen Page manage to fix their relationship by breaking down walls? Let me know in the comments!


As a side note, during the long scene with Matthew Murdock and the Punisher on the roof, the Punisher gives some advice to Matthew that reveals the same type of ideas. The Punisher is the wise fool. He teaches us what can happen when our pain is felt so deeply from loss. The Punisher realized that the risk was worth it, and continues to fight for the love he had, even if it is not through the best methods. Matthew Murdock gets to benefit from his advice.